Dialogue On The Way Of Knowledge - Part ll
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I've decided to add, what I'm calling, Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge, to my site, Carlos Castaneda's don Juan's Teachings. It began Mon, Jun 28th, 1999, when I received an E-Mail from Michael. I will use "M:" to begin his comments, R: to begin mine. This is part two of the dialogue. It continues where part 1 left off.
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(Note to readers: We don't have the E-mail written to Michael that prompted his reply. It is pretty much self explainatory, however.)
M: To an apprentice FROM MICHAEL
M: You noted that "things are looking a bit odd" to you, and probably there are several reasons including the ones previously noted demonstrating the "connection" between ourselves and the universe and also quite probably the changes that have occurred within yourself.
M: Also, you asked some questions, so I'll attempt to respond to those.
Apprentice: 1. What do we need these heavy bodily vehicles for?
M: The process requires evaluation from the broadest wide-angle view. In my understanding of the evolutionary process, we, and for that matter all of humanity, followed the path of classic evolution from a collection of cells into a far more involved complex organism into the development of true sentient consciousness. The interaction of that sentience with the organic body that facilitated the development of sentience, is intense to the extent that through thought and will, energy that has been produced through cellular interactions within the body can be directed and focused by and through our consciousness. In other words, we need our bodies initially during our evolution as sources of energy for our sentient consciousness to use in turn, in it's own development. This process of interdependency continues until the energy of our consciousness develops to the point where the energy (and therefore the dependency) of the body is no longer required.
M: We know, through science, that the "glue" that holds all matter together is comprised of electric fields between the molecular clusters that are appropriate for the particular form of matter. In organic systems, the molecular clusters are really the genetic cells within our bodies. Science has shown that the mechanical separation between these cells is about 300 nanometers (300 times 10 to the -9th power). The electric field intensity across the 300 nanometer boundaries is about 10 to the 7th power (ten million volts/meter). Although it isn't proven at this point, my suspicion/projection is that "we" (meaning you and I and others like us) have learned/are learning, to access a portion of these fields, which can then be directed and focused through our "ability" (will).
M: The nature of our sentient consciousness (what religions would term "the soul") probably resides in substructures within our brains that the noted mathematician Roger Penrose (who has shared awards with Stephen Hawking) terms "microtubules". (It was refreshing to learn that another was contemplating these concepts in a manner that complemented my own projections.) What Penrose hypothesizes is that the standard model of our brains of dendrites and synapse links cannot possibly explain sentience simply because there are not even vaguely enough of these to perform the complexities of what true sentience would require. Accordingly, Penrose asserts that the synapse links must be something like a wide-area network that serves to interconnect far more complex and intricate structures together, and these probably exist at the subatomic level within microtubules.
M: Given all of these concepts, which tend of course to match my own speculations if not projections, the process of our evolution probably follows the path that our microcellular DNA pre-programs (something like a micro-code in computers) our organic systems to build our bodies and our sentience, and that these inherited characteristics (memories of prior-lives could be stored in DNA, for example) predispose us toward certain characteristics of evolution. Science has shown that at least fifty percent of what we call "personality" is probably pre-determined by our DNA coding, and that specific "abilities" or talents/attributes (religions would say "gifts") are all held within that micro-code of DNA.
M: At some point, we can learn to project our consciousness beyond the body. If our sentience is formed by fields in a micro-structure that resembles quantum electrodynamics (a specialized segment of quantum mechanics) as Penrose implies, then another component becomes enabled. Science clearly - very clearly - understands that once an electromagnetic wave is launched into space, it propagates to infinity. The electric field component is supported in a closed system fashion by the induction field component that in turn supports the electric field component. This process resembles in structure, though not in cause, the effect of the "soliton wave" that was first observed in canals in Europe in the late 1800's. In a soliton wave of water moving through a canal, the forward motion of the wave and it's height, is supported by the inward pressure from the walls of the canal, meaning that the forward loss of energy caused by the forward motion of the wave is compensated fully by the inward pressures of the wave's energy against the walls of the canal boundary, which in turn boosts the forward energy to the point where it is maintained. The process of propagation in electromagnetic fields resembles this process between the electric and induction field boundaries.
M: If our consciousness is formed in the quantum mechanics subset of electrodynamics at the subatomic level, then astral projection and the continuation of our sentience beyond the body is simply a matter of learning how to manipulate, direct, and focus our "energy" (a misnomer actually because it is really "field").
M: In reviewing history, it is possible that the process utilized to accomplish these feats has been known to small groups in humanity for quite some time, and given the best descriptive terminology they had at various times in history. It is fascinating to read of the "energy columns" that Jacob (who was renamed "Israel", meaning "struggle with god") observed and that are reported in the old testament as "Jacob's Ladders". The description really suggests that these are not ladders as popularized, but rather ramps, columns or pathways, that connect "souls" (sentience) into higher planes of being. You have experienced the columns, and even manipulated them, and soon you will be able to see them. About the same time in history that Jacob was having his experiences, others seemed to find parallels although they were worlds apart. The Maya in North America appear to have been formed about 3500 BP (before present), and the sub-group within the Maya, the Toltecs, clearly were reported to have extraordinary abilities ranging in history from about 3000 BP to about 1200 BP, enveloping the period between the old and new testaments rather well. All of this is part of evolution, insofar as can be determined.
Apprentice: 2. Is this body another one of those "tests"? - Do we need to move though it?
M: As noted above, the body is initially a very essential component of our evolution, and full evolution is suggested when we can will ourselves beyond it's limitations.
Apprentice: 3. Is the challenge learning to leave the solidness behind?
M: The challenge is learning to leave dependencies behind, and the negative implications that these carry. The Yaqui Indians (who descended from the Toltecs) say that this process is "loosing the human form", which consists of dependencies on many structures, both external to an individual and internal to an individual (in the form of imprints and distortions, most of which are initially established in childhood). The goal is "freedom", and that can only be accomplished through self-impeccability.
Apprentice: 4. As you mentioned the "no accidents" syndrome, the body carries us to a point of existence, and, 5. At what point can we release and what does it require besides will?
M: Primarily it requires the development of the ability to gather and utilize "energy" (using the term that should be "fields" and hence is not exactly accurate) so that we can be free of dependencies. The process requires a high sense of self, in the best form that Ayn Rand's work suggests (in her works, The Fountainhead, and Atlas Shrugged), so that there are no dependencies on others, on egotism, on self- deprecations, on anger, et al. To say the least, "will" is required in the form of determination to accomplish these goals that lead to freedom. When the Yaquis state that "freedom is the eagles' gift", they mean through the metaphor of "the eagle" that the dependencies on the negative elements of the human form have been lost so that the consciousness will not be inhibited by the body or any other dependencies, so that it can continue into infinity - just the way an electromagnetic field propagates when is set free into space.
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R: You do, very much, honor me with your time and writing.
M: You're welcome. There was a very defined purpose to our interconnection.
R: You wondered what I was holding on to. That reminded me of this line, "The wisdom It bombards. What am I holding on to?"
M: Wisdom can bombard, but with full and whole acceptance, it becomes "knowledge", as in "just and only knowledge". At that point, it only requires action, commit, decision, definition of impeccability and stringent action within those definitions. Knowledge without utilization, is impotent knowledge. A book never opened is just a structural object. A book opened and read, is only transferred information. A book opened, read, understood and integrated, is omnipotent knowledge to the extent of it's ability to alter one's course.
R: It occurred to me today that I'm holding on to all of what I've come to call "normalcy."
M: Hummm. "Normalcy". I wonder what that is. Normal for everyone is different and probably dichotomous from any other. "Normalcy" is only a reality, and there are many forms of those constructions. They form each a universe unto themselves that we may visit in sequence or as alternates as we travel.
R: I remember once in the 70's an experience of having the sense of no universe, nothing, just black silence. That was very strange, similar to a memory from a childhood fever dream of being trapped in an unexplainable place. It reminded me of some of Castaneda's power plant related descriptions.
M: Although I've never toyed with drugs, other than the antibiotic type, my opinion is that chemically alteration of pathways, is just artificial. An individual's psychology driven in turn by philosophy and concept can, in fact, alter chemistry and then it becomes natural and real. There are many trials for those of us who engage, and your process along your path is progressing.
R: I wrote to someone yesterday who had written to me with what seemed to me to be a mistaken concept of "detachment." I said to him, "I've been reading Castaneda's books since 1968 and have never been much able to "detach" myself from the day to day world we are all in. But when I say that, I'm not talking about quitting anything. That is not detachment." Michael, I don't like seeing people take out pieces of the teachings of don Juan and then make up some "rule" for themselves that they feel they should therefore follow.
M: Relative to "detachment", it is observed that "detachment" can also be "withdrawal" which can be an excuse for "not engaging". Certainly, it's not as strong as "quitting" but for all intents and purposes, if "detachment" continues for a long enough period, it has the same result as quitting. "Detachment" as a "not doing" for a period of time to recalibrate oneself is often useful.
R: I've seen someone do that. This person told me how he was taking back the "edge" from his children. I probably should have told him that that was a nutty thing to say, that he had no idea what he was talking about, the teachings had nothing to do with grabbing onto one small aspect that you don't understand and then acting like you do.
M: The problem with altering realities of individuals, is that it requires a huge background in 'knowing' the person that one is interfacing with. As an empath, for example, it's relatively easy (simple, in fact) to perceive and to 'know' provided that a person is directly known and engaged upon. However, through any "book" or series of books there is true detachment to an unknown person, it's a normal human- form process to cause 'knowledge' to become a 'belief system' rather than a sequence of "knowledge" that may be applied toward self-evolution. Any "belief system" per se, can be dangerous because individuals can become wholly dependent on the arbitrary belief system simply because they are in hunger for 'the truth'. As a facilitator, or a teacher, or whatever functional terms that may be applied, it is best to facilitate another in gaining their own 'experiences' that they can operate from, because 'experiences' in contact with the teacher can have understanding based upon the broader knowledge of the teacher - error correction, if you will allow. Then, with an increasing sequence of personal experiences, it's no longer a question of blind belief but rather a real operating concept that has a firm basis for each person.
R: Back to the writter with what I thought to be the mistaken idea of "detachment," I wrote, "Do you want to be detached from your present life? Here is how that works: You detach yourself from your present life by becoming fully involved in it in every detail and doing your absolute best in every aspect of it. In fact, the only possible way to do your absolute best in every aspect of your current life is by being fully detached from it. This has nothing to do with leaving anything or anyone, it has to do with not being hooked to the results of your efforts in whatever you do. You do your best, and then you do your best again, and then again, and you never stop! And you're totally "detached" from the results, you're not after (nor are you shunning) fame or glory or money ... you're just after doing your best. Period. That is detachment and not thinking you have to "leave" anything. What you have to leave is the notion that there is anything to leave. That is detachment."
M: Another way of stating this is to say that one must operate with impeccability toward his/her tasks, and impeccability demands objectivity, which is exactly the form of 'detachment' that you state. A person's ability to be objective about anything, starts with their ability to be objective about themselves. A person's ability to trust, starts with their ability to trust themselves. A person's ability to loose the human form with sufficient self-esteem to love unconditionally, starts with an individual ability to love oneself unconditionally, that that in turn, facilitates connection to the power of the universe. In working with my proteges and apprentices, the above is an emphasis in all matters, hard science, or metaphysical development. The 'detachment' that you speak of is in actuality, detachment from the human form of emotions, those emotions that will distort objectivity and falsify the results and the value of any 'knowledge'.
M: The expansion of this drives one to be detached from any negative connotation associated with death, and therein is found detachment in the form that you have indicated. The removal of negative connotation is to be replaced with the goal: continuance; freedom from consumption by the eagle. Detachment; that is, removal of the negative connotation by itself, is not sufficient because the goal is not stated "only" by detachment and loosing the human form. The goal is continuance: into infinity; the result of personal power, which better said, is really attribute or ability, thus circumventing the human-form connotation of 'power' (which to society means many negative constructs).
R: From my Castaneda compilation, don Juan says, "A detached man, who knows he has no possibility of fencing off his death, has only one thing to back himself with: the power of his decisions. He has to be, so to speak, the master of his choices. He must fully understand that his choice is his responsibility and once he makes it there is no longer time for regrets or recriminations. His decisions are final, simply because his death does not permit him time to cling to anything. And thus with an awareness of his death, with his detachment, and with the power of his decisions a warrior sets his life in a strategical manner. The knowledge of his death guides him and makes him detached and silently lusty; the power of his final decisions makes him able to choose without regrets and what he chooses is always strategically the best; and so he performs everything he has to with gusto and lusty efficiency."
M: Objectivity prevails! Ayn Rand couldn't have done better.
R: Don Juan continues, "A man can go still further than that; a man can learn to see. Upon learning to see he no longer needs to live like a warrior, nor be a sorcerer. Upon learning to see a man becomes everything by becoming nothing. He, so to speak, vanishes and yet he's there. I would say that this is the time when a man can be or can get anything he desires. But he desires nothing, and instead of playing with his fellow men like they were toys, he meets them in the midst of their folly. The only difference between them is that a man who sees controls his folly, while his fellow men can't. A man who sees has no longer an active interest in his fellow men. Seeing has already detached him from absolutely everything he knew before."
M: Yes! Another expansion of the term is that there is sufficient knowledge, ability and self-esteem, that the dependencies on human-form control are no longer necessary. True, point-blank. This does NOT mean that the person does not control in the form of self-navigation, himself, and only himself.
R: And, "Don't let the idea of being detached from everything you know give you the chills. The thing which should give you the chills is not to have anything to look forward to but a lifetime of doing that which you have always done. Think of the man who plants corn year after year until he's too old and tired to get up, so he lies around like an old dog. His thoughts and feelings, the best of him, ramble aimlessly to the only things he has ever done, to plant corn. For me that is the most frightening waste there is. Detachment does not automatically mean wisdom, but it is nonetheless, an advantage because it allows the warrior to pause momentarily to reassess situations, to reconsider positions. In order to use that extra moment consistently and correctly, however, a warrior has to struggle unyieldingly for a lifetime."
M: To get in touch with one's evolution, it's necessary to have a vision, and a vision cannot come from locked minds. Once even a small shaft of light opens for a potential warrior to see, then it's up to the candidate warrior to open in increasing ways to learn where the shaft of light has it's derivatives, then act in proportion to that knowledge.
R: Don Juan again, "A warrior is someone who seeks freedom. Sadness is not freedom. We must snap out of it. Having a sense of detachment entails having a moment's pause to reassess situations."
M: Yes.
R: Continuing, "Formlessness is, if anything, a detriment to sobriety and levelheadedness. An aspect of being detached, the capacity to become immersed in whatever one is doing, naturally extends to everything one does, including being inconsistent, and outright petty. The advantage of being formless is that it allows us a moment's pause, providing that we have the self-discipline and courage to utilize it."
M: Even as pure sentience, fields of consciousness in the third attention, we are NOT formless or undefined though. In the third attention, the ultimate in evolution, and particularly while travelling at near light speed, it requires cohesiveness to maintain oneself as coherent energy, coherent consciousness. Any human form dependency, even in small distractions, threaten this especially during travel. When at a destination in the third attention, the energetic form of consciousness is wholly coherent, concise, and can learn as a stalker and participate as a dreamer or a stalker: this is instructed from experience of multiple occasions.
R: Don Juan, "Petty tyrants teach us detachment."
M: Very, very true. This is the asset they represent.
R: Don Juan, "The ingredients of the new seers' strategy shows how efficient and clever is the device of using a petty tyrant. The strategy not only gets rid of self-importance; it also prepares warriors for the final realization that impeccability is the only thing that counts in the path of knowledge."
M: Very very true.
R: Don Juan, "The first attention consumes all the glow of awareness that human beings have, and not an iota of energy is left free. So, the new seers proposed that warriors, since they have to enter into the unknown, have to save their energy."
M: With preparation, the unknown is "not" unknown in any large measure. What is attempted to be said by this, is that it's not a quantum leap into the unknown for the warrior who is sufficiently prepared because during the trials of self-preparation, each component, each element along the 'way of knowledge' becomes almost fore-known at least to the point where each new experience is not a out-of-context surprise. Although the experiences may be unique at the time of newness, they are not unanticipated: they have a flow; this, facilitates the process.
R: Don Juan, "But where are they going to get energy, if all of it is taken? They'll get it from eradicating unnecessary habits. Eradicating unnecessary habits detaches awareness from self-reflection and allows it the freedom to focus on something else. To be a peerless nagual, one has to love freedom, and one has to have supreme detachment. What makes the warrior's path so very dangerous is that it is the opposite of the life situation of modern man. Modern man has left the realm of the unknown and the mysterious, and has settled down in the realm of the functional. He has turned his back to the world of the foreboding and the exulting and has welcomed the world of boredom. If warriors are going to have an internal dialogue, they should have the proper dialogue. That's the detached manipulation of intent through sober commands."
M: Good.
R: Don Juan, "The solicitation is the same as the dreaming practices. But for a perfect result, you must add to your practices the intent of reaching those inorganic beings. Send a feeling of power and confidence to them, a feeling of strength, of detachment. Avoid at any cost sending a feeling of fear or morbidity. They are pretty morbid by themselves; to add your morbidity to them is unnecessary, to say the least."
M: The concept of inorganic beings is really difficult to many to understand initially. We, in the form of the third attention, become pure fields of consciousness, and consequently inorganic. Somehow, in the process of the instruction, it has been lost about that inorganic really means, at least in my opinion for any form of real clarity to the novice.
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R: I'm thinking that I don't know what to do next.
M: At least the process has re-awakened within you. That's the first step.
R: Castaneda referred to a task given to him by don Juan but he never really tells us what it is.
M: At the risk of wiggling your impressions, at reminding that I've met Castaneda, my opinion is that don Juan Matus primarily utilized him as a scribe to transfer information through the parables and experiences that DJM sourced to CC. DJM "taught" CC, that is sourced experiences to him, primarily in the assemblage point shift of the second attention. To me, that is a very ineffective way because if nothing else, CC and the others were very disoriented about this for a long time. CC himself, was to be utilized primarily as a scribe/reporter and with that information, a transferor of information - but, and it's sad to say - CC himself didn't really have much energy at least from experience with my limite exposure to him. It's useful to emphasize that DJM repeatedly informed CC that he was to serve DJM in the form of a scribe or reporter, confirming the opinion noted above. From my observation, CC had a very difficult time getting into even the second attention without the energetic help of DJM or Carol, or one of the others. A woman who was in his entourage helped him toward the end. I watched her and CC together, and because I easily see cocoons and energy, it's simple to recognize where the energy was being derived: In my opinion, this woman in his entourage was the source and, I might add, his protector. It appears that in the later years CC relegated himself to the role as an instructor based on his information and experiences, and although he had large influence among others (I have seen this also) it was because the others "gave" it to him on their will and dependency-based need, rather than his sourcing energy to them. Also sad, when someone asked him a question that was just outside of his experience bases, he couldn't seem to evolve an answer and I observed at least two occasions where the answers were obfuscations. If you carefully think about the interaction that DJM often utilized to CC, it was heavily biased toward CC being a scribe. The others, Florinda et al, called him (sometimes derisively) "Nagual", but in truth, according to my observations, that would imply an energy form that he hadn't developed at the time of our meetings (hours worth) a few years ago.
M: I believe that this is just a normal function of what DJM intended CC to be: a reporter. It also explains some inconsistencies that occurred in the two later books well after DJM departed from CC's daily presence or access.
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R: For myself, I'm now looking at how to be more impeccable, how to entice the "spirit to descend." Again, not that I know what that means other than from reading Castaneda.
M: The energetic form required does not literally descend to you. Rather, one can summon the energy by: being wholly open to the impact and the knowledge; and, facilitating this by projection unconditional love "toward" the universe; this, basically informing the energy that 'one is ready'. In my own experiences, it was questionable if it came to me or if I projected into it, and merged as one with it, although the more profound experiences this was the situation in the third attention. After a time, and after full engagement, a partnership of sorts forms. A previously noted apprentice, on discovering or perceiving this, became curious and perhaps confused about the separation between the individual and the power of the universe. My response to her, a very capable apprentice, took the following analogy ...
M: Suppose one can imagine that each sentient being, organic or not (since sentient consciousness energy may be initially derived from organic sources, once launched into space it is itself NOT organic) forms a coherent energy 'cell' (CC/DJM used the 'cocoon' or 'egg' term) that can by intent move through time and space, it by itself is and must be a coherent and complete energy system. Now, suppose that at each meeting, each gathering of such energy cells, a merge is formed at the intersection. This would imply that each energy cell, while still individual as an entity, is connected during the merge. (This is what was intended to be described in my 'joining' with the person mentioned a couple of E-mails ago.) While connected, energy (through knowledge) is exchanged and each is enhanced.
M: Now, suppose, that there is a three-dimensional-grid form that we can call "the power of the universe", and it is indeed universal. Suppose that this "power of the universe" is a quantum electrodynamic form of energy (Science is aware of the potential of several such forms) that streams through the universe, and that 'we', as sentient consciousness fields of coherence, can connect to this and direct or channel this through our intent and will, and as noted before, can join with it and with each other.
M: The apprentice came up with the comment: "we are grid members!"; and that is an very appropriate comment; we are, separate but able to engage "the grid" (using this analogy) that is formed by the intersections of each other, and with a energy stream that we can utilize to propel us through the universe much like a normal space satellite (like Voyager) is propelled through space an time by handshaking itself as a hitchhiker upon the gravitational fields of planets and moons.
M: Advancing this analogy, every time we 'engage' each other (meaning those of us who choose to interact, commit, bond to the extent where we merge our fields eventually) we form another meshed intersection "in the grid". On every occasion that this occurs, the grid is made more powerful, stronger.
M: This description could continue to expand, however that is probably sufficient for now.
R: I suspect that I'm ready to experience it without an outward reaction on my part. But then that's more of a belief about what I think one is suppose to do, based on Castaneda reading.
M: It wouldn't matter if you did react. The point of the matter is to facilitate the connection, not if you react. In my histories, there have been many examples where I was nearly overwhelmed by a connection and did have an outward reaction. Being "detached" in the terms that you have been using in this case, means being "detached" from caring what societal's reaction to my reaction might be, and many explanations can be offered to others on a whim. If being concerned about overt reaction somehow impedes you, then that concern forms a impediment. Being open to the experience is most efficient without any impediment whatever.
R: Perhaps it hasn't happened because I've not really expected it. The doubt I've had, really, until listening to you. And yet, listening to you, I am not surprised in the least with my new conviction that it is true, it's more like I've always known it was true. And you've come along at the time when I have taken what I'd held to be my major untaken step.
M: It probably will not surprise you to hear that with respect to this last phrase, I've heard this on many occasions ... come along at the time ... It reminds me of the Irish proverb: "When the student is ready the teacher appears ... ", something to quietly be pleased about. There are no coincidences.
M: Perhaps you've been 'holding back', holding on to first attention schnarff (a buzz word we use around horses) "just in case" your doubts would prevail. This, it can be extrapolated, to be a self-fulfilling prophecy since 'the doubt' would cause a non-result.
R: The untaken step of switching to "pure" food, i.e., no refined anything, lots of fresh vegetable juice, brown rice and beans, some fish, many greens and fruits. I've now been doing that near perfectly for six months.
M: There is health possible simply by moderation. Typically, in normalcy at least, our bodies have sufficient filtration systems to deal with bacteriological and chemical impacts that nature foists upon us in any case. The definition of "pure" in modern terms, is much overused. Even within our bodies themselves, there are sufficient chemical events that taken out of sequence, can kill us. My opinion - and it's an opinion of course, based on experience - is only to focus on the chemical compounds that are beneficial, but those could be artificial (even refined - Pasteurization is refinement for example) as well. If it were not for artificial assistance, heavily concentrated and distilled antibiotics, it is quite certain that my body would not be alive today.
R: I've allowed myself to be easily pulled to self-pity/depression, then anger. And yet, I can intend myself to turn that all off, breath deeply, listen.
M: Me thinks we all go through this as we re-base ourselves. It's observed that self-pity and depression are dependencies that (probably) become ingrained early in life - and they are serious dependencies. Anger, a derivative of frustration, is an extension of those dependencies. You are a very kind and loving person that has experienced turmoil and confusion in history, and situations such as that cause a form of "oscillation" between self-aggrandizement on one side, and self-deprecation on another. In these situations of oscillation, my analogy is like that of a piece of metal being flexed frequently. Eventually the metal will tire and fatigue at the crease of flexure, weaken then eventually break. The "way of knowledge" provides an alternative "middle" where everything "is as it must be".
R: I'll work on that. And I'll force myself to exercise. And limit the internal dialogue crap.
M: "Force" is a very strong human-form term, perhaps. Feeling into your words, "dialogue crap" feels angry. Perhaps finding a "flow" ... would be more appropriate.
M: The physical body schnarff is only a tool of focus, not a result. The body as a tool of focus can become the limitation to progress because the body's action can become the dependency. In my observation, this happened to CC himself, and somewhere he couldn't move beyond it. It is necessary to move beyond the body and the body's actions.
R: There are many money related things to deal with. (note: I've removed the story)
M: It is very significant that you have opened in this dialogue to the extent that you have. The economics "are" important because they are a distraction and can form a significant dependency. IF one doesn't have enough to get by comfortably, then one is so distracted that they cannot have sufficient time to evolve in other respects. On the other extreme side, if one is obsessed with money and wealth, then yet another side of the dependency coin is formed. Although your report indicates that you've experimented with art forms as a technique of altering your perceptions, the observation suggested by this is that the method is seeking assistance from outside yourself, not within, by using art forms as a tool for change. Perhaps, since you have proficiency in a specific (gem) business, if you can re-base yourself into a 'comfortable' level of effort where it functions with your life but does not control it, then you'd find more mental freedom and peace within yourself for these over evolutionary functions.
R: (Note: more story removed) I only tell you that as you are open to me for some reason you have not stated (and I am very very grateful).
M: Do you "really" need to know? Do you "really" not understand? Perhaps ... Place yourself out into the sun, with your face downward toward the earth. Extend your arms comfortably outward, palms facing the earth. Feel the energy in your palms, which are now facing downward from the sun in their own shadows. Feel the sensations at the palms of your hands, and if it is imbalanced, left to right, attempt with your mind to find a balance as if the energy in your palms were streaming down to the earth to balance your body as a center point. With that accomplished in balance, allow the perception at the palms of your hands to increase to it's natural level. Then, with that mediation, slowly elevate the angle of your face toward the sun. The energy can then be channeled through your upper body to and then through your hands, and this can form an energy stream.
M: When this is accomplished, contemplate softly, very softly, who I might be in any way that you might consider.
R: (note: More removed story)
M: My own version of this is classical piano. When I was very young, perhaps aged four, I was plopped at a keyboard, and I played. Well. By age five, I was plopped in front of an audience of about 600 - 800 people, scared to death to the point of being shaky, and declared "a prodigy" by professionals, using terms such as "oh my god, listen to this". Even then, I didn't care and wholly resented the "pressure" to perform "for them". No one heard my plea that this was "just me", and that I was only using the piano as an implement to describe what I was feeling - and expression tool - an extension of my body to express. I could never understand "why" everyone made such a fuss over what was "just me".
M: By age 13 or 14 or so, it was discovered that I could simply compose spontaneously based on what I was trying to 'say' to myself, FOR myself, at the time. About that time, having recognized that the music department was using me for political gain and funding, "they" decided that I had to have a higher teacher (up to this point, there had been a sequence of three, but #1 and #2 were my favorites because they nourished my expression - in other words, did not meddle). This teacher approached the piano like a drill instructor in the Marine Corps with strict cadence and music selections that were intended for one purpose: win competition.
M: That did it. No power on earth could make me play the piano. Halt. Stop. Perhaps it was the wooden ruler smacking the top of the keyboard that did it, and the temper tantrum from this new instructor. In any case, the piano was history for me until approximately age 22 when I discovered that it was an important element of expression, but there was no longer a mentor as there had been in the early years, so the attempt was half-hearted. About age 33, with many other things falling apart in my life and immediately before joining with the psychologist group previously mentioned, with some encouragement of a neighbor who had a Steinway "C" (about 7' 6") and some assistance in locating pianos, searched for a concert grand (9'), because that is was I had grown up with, and the acoustic result and touch needed to be replicated from my past. After several weeks, and perhaps fifty pianos, I found 'my piano' and it remains with me today so that I can be expressive for myself, and very - very rarely for any other, and even then on my own selection. I have composed perhaps 35 multi-movement pieces, each movement with it's own emotion and communication, and wholly refuse to publish.
R: (Note: More removed story)
M: To me, this is just simply another example of mismanaged youth and certainly what I have reported to you above is another example. The facts of history - our individual histories - are important in the recapitulation of ourselves. The ultimate resolution is, though, what we eventually do about it.
M: Since you mentioned it for yourself, I was born in San Diego. My mother, the Sevillana, born of nobility, married my father overseas. He was a Captain in the Marine Corps at the time, having graduated from Annapolis. They had been married for about eight years, having travelled through pre-Maoist China in the period of 'the sand pebbles' (Yangtze river patrol) in the mid-30's. In early 1941, they conceived their only child. In Fall of 1941, working from wherever they were at the time (don't know) overseas, my father was re-assigned to Pearl Harbor to become commander of a Marine Corps detachment on the Battleship Oklahoma based at Pearl. My father would not allow his pregnant wife to travel to Pearl. As a ranking officer (Major, I believe by then) he had some information. My mother, who had a measured I.Q. of something like 205, played wonderful piano, could speak fluently Spanish (naturally), English, French and German, was sent into San Diego (the Military can move people to their bases quickly), came into the United States, a citizen of Spain but the wife of a ranking officer, and 5 days later, I popped out, in the middle of November 1941. About three weeks later, the Japanese attacked my father's battleships at Pearl and he went to war. My mother had no domestic skills (she spent her pre-married life going to school and deciding what yacht to go out on) and the country mobilized for war, removing her domestic support system. My father's family had/has a ranch along the eastern border near the Sabine River - with cattle ranching lands north of San Antonio, and San Diego was considered to be a military target, so the threat problem and the support structure for mother and self was resolved by sending us to a rural area.
M: Rural life and my mother's (ah, well, social stature) was difficult for her, but at least we were relatively safe and she had a structure. I will never forget the day, about 1945, that a man appeared: my father. I had no idea who he was, was not imprinted with a father, didn't know what 'a father was' by then. My mother and self would read Thomas Merton, Thomas Aquinas, and other philosophers, (didn't get many comic books) and the ranch had no other children so I grew up in relative isolation, raised by very gentle grandparents and my intellectual mom. We spent a great deal of time "contemplating" the ways things work. I had no children to play with. None. The closest town was about 19 miles away. My play companion was my imagination and a cocker spaniel.
M: My father, picking up on discovery that he had a son that he had never seen (he knew, obviously, that I was around but we had never met) decided to pick up on my mother's approach, and he applied in attempting to bond to me what he understood: kinetic physics; chess. My physique is short (5' 8") relatively, and although he held world-championship in some competitive gymnastics events while at the Naval Academy, it held no interest to me, because I only knew of intellectual pursuits, and knew zippo about sports. Anyway, my father and self, having not been imprinted with each other in the formative years initially, were "friends", but we didn't become close until after my mother died when I was aged about 40. He died a few years later, and I'm pleased that we had resolution to our relationship.
M: After high school, I fell (through a friend) into a field of systems integration that worked on communication and weapons systems for the government, and quite literally, I simply could "perceive" the way things worked or didn't work. I became obsessed with this technology, and prospered in electromagnetic fields and waves. Before age 21, was managing two laboratories, and about 50 staff engineers, and at age 23 was director of systems engineering for another group, and chief engineer of a Teledyne division by about age 28. The blah-blah goes on for a long time. I became an independent consultant in 1976 working only by myself through to now. My business slowed down, after being in warp-drive for all previous years with internationally extensive travel (logging about 400,000 miles/year). Along the way, I developed extensive relationships with about 100 proteges scattered all over the planet, and of these, several "apprentices" in the way of knowledge (perhaps 20).
M: About two years ago my business dramatically slowed down, and now I'm re-basing myself, trying to find a focus for myself. Apart from the structural/historical stuff above, my 'way on the path' was well established (my mother and self were empaths together, and often telepaths - this runs in the family) but very confused at about age eight, and it wasn't until my mid-thirties with the entry with the psychologist group previously noted in a prior E-mail that finally I had someone to mentor me and gain self-acceptance that I could never find in society. Once one grows up in isolation, it can never be fully reversed.
R: I would love to understand what physicists are talking about when they talk about the beauty of mathematics.
M: Advanced mathematics is only a vocabulary to describe something in a form of shorthand that could be stated with words. You might enjoy reading Roger Penrose's book, "The Emperor's New Mind". In my observation, at some level of advancement, there is little difference conceptually between spatial physics, quantum electrodynamics/mechanics (read: Erwin Schrodinger and Werner Heisenberg, for example) and "the way of knowledge in the form of metaphysics. When Albert Einstein came up first with the "Special Theory of Relativity" he reported that it was based on a vision. At the time, as a matter of well documented record, Einstein did not know any advanced math. He learned math later, as a matter of need to communicate his ideas - after the fact of his ideas.
R: Aw, a practical task ... I don't think it possible anymore for it to be to learn math to a level that would allow me to teach it.
M: The commit you are making to 'the way of knowledge' is far more important for you in any case.
M: Now, after all of this exchange, I truly hope you attempt the perceptional exercise that was noted in this E-mail. You have learned through this and in the exchanges before, much of my experiences and now early history which was prompted only by your revelations of self. My observation is that when individuals offer histories such as that, it is appropriate to return in kind.
M: Somehow I feel the need to introduce myself to you yet again: Hello. My name is Michael. I am only myself.
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More to come ... let me know what you think about it. - Rick
Introduction
The Teachings of don Juan
A Separate Reality
Journey to Ixtlan
Tales Of Power
The Second Ring of Power
The Eagle's Gift
The Fire From Within
The Power of Silence
The Art of Dreaming
The Active Side of Infinity
Appendix A thru E
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part l
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part ll
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part lll
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part lV
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part V
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part Vl
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part Vll
Dialogue on the Way of Knowledge - Part VllI
Please send e-mail to me by clicking on my name.Rick Mace
My pottery page is here. Rick Mace Pottery